Chelsea and I prowl the PetsMart, looking for rawhide chew toys. By the time we reach the counter, my arms laden with both my purchases and a hyperactive puppy, I’m loaded to capacity. At the counter, an observant young man offers to help me get my bags to the car. Given Chelsea’s wigglesome mood, I welcome the offer.
On the way to the car, he coos at Chelsea and talks about his work. Once the car is loaded, he pats Chelsea on the head and tells her goodbye.
I thank him for his help … and then the unpleasantness begins.
The young man shrinks back; he looks as though I’ve offered to hit him. His sunniness disappears behind a cloud of offense. “Yeah,” he says. “And thank you, too.”
It dawns on me that he expected a tip for his assistance. Almost mechanically, I start to reach for my wallet … but, at the same time, I’m a bit taken aback by his sudden change in attitude and open hostility. I pause … and a split second later, decide I won’t be bullied into tipping. Instead, I smile brightly and say, “Sure!”
His face gets uglier. “Yeah, and if I can do anything else for you today, you just come back and let me know what it is.” He walks off.
That’s it — I’ve had it with tipping. It’s a nasty custom, and we’d all be better off without it.
Let me stress here that, historically, I’ve gone out of my way to be a generous tipper. When we travel internationally, I research local tipping customs (not always an easy thing to do), so I can do the right thing. At restaurants, we leave gracious tips … even when service, as is more and more often the case, is mediocre at best.
I always tip my barber. I worry about whether or not to tip the carpet cleaner (who seems to expect it), the electrician who installed our ceiling fans (who made it clear he expected it), and the yard man who cuts our grass (I decided that, with this one, I wouldn’t start it).
And don’t get me wrong — by saying I’m tipped out, I’m not saying I’ll stop tipping hard-working wait staff or bellmen or others who depend on tips for a significant portion of their livelihood.
However: I’m considering becoming an advocate for eliminating tipping altogether. Here’s why:
– Workers deserve a fair wage. This business of allowing restaurants to pay less than minimum wage is foolishness. Establishments should pay their employees a fair wage, period. If profits are so low that paying the waitstaff a fair wage would bankrupt the restaurant … the restaurant probably deserves to close.
– The issue of performance should be handled by managers. If an employee is not performing up to the restaurant’s standards, that performance should be addressed by management — not by requiring customers to “vote” on performance by deciding whether or not to leave a dollar on the table.
– Tipping engenders a mindset of entitlement. Once, a waitperson who abandoned me during the middle of my meal reappeared in the parking lot as I left the restaurant … to demand his tip! Not long ago, a terrible waiter, fired mid-shift, appeared at my party’s table to demand his tips before leaving the restaurant.
– Tipping customs aren’t well-documented or standardized, breeding confusion and stress. How much do you tip a hairstylist? A cabbie? A yard man? What rule governs which persons are considered “tippable?” Do you tip the tram driver who takes you to your rental car? Do you tip the delivery man? Do you tip movers? If so, what percentages are appropriate … and which percentages send what messages?
We’d do well to learn from Asian nations, where, as little as ten years ago, tipping was unheard of. In China, in fact, a tip still implies the employer does not pay a fair wage — and is, therefore, considered an insult.
We should do work we enjoy. We should pay people a fair wage. We should help others because we choose to, not in an effort to pick up a wad of cash in return.
We should recognize tipping for the quaint, out-dated custom it is — and do away with it.
Yeah, tipping is a strange custom, yet I’m waiting tables for living right now… My job is good enough for now but the whole tipping thing is unfair to both patrons and waitstaff. It’s the only kind of job where I can work through lunch and dinner with no guarantee that I’ll be reasonably compensated for my hard work… Like, say you get a contractor out to your house to install some electrical, pay him for the parts, and when he (or she)’s done, tell him “Thanks!”So, he’s basically worked for free when he could have been doing something else making $$… It’s the same thing when a table runs me to death for an hour and leaves me exact change on a $70 check. Actually, where I work, I’m out $1.40 because the servers have to tip the hostess 2%… All that should be included in the price of the meal so everyone knows up front… Guests know exactly what the meal costs, servers know what they’re making per hour, the host, etc… But Restaurant owners would never pay waitstaff what they average in tips… It would be harder to keep good servers and no one (casual diners) would pay the crazy prices for a meal required to offset the dramatic increase in labor costs… 10 servers @ 2.13=21.30/hour versus 10 servers at say $10= $100/hour…. see where this is going? There is one restaurant around here where it works like that; the Colt & Allison, a 5-star, 5-diamond, members only steakhouse… a waiter there is paid $17/hour and the guests get their dollar’s worth.
Yeah, tipping is a strange custom, yet I’m waiting tables for living right now… My job is good enough for now but the whole tipping thing is unfair to both patrons and waitstaff. It’s the only kind of job where I can work through lunch and dinner with no guarantee that I’ll be reasonably compensated for my hard work… Like, say you get a contractor out to your house to install some electrical, pay him for the parts, and when he (or she)’s done, tell him “Thanks!”So, he’s basically worked for free when he could have been doing something else making $$… It’s the same thing when a table runs me to death for an hour and leaves me exact change on a $70 check. Actually, where I work, I’m out $1.40 because the servers have to tip the hostess 2%… All that should be included in the price of the meal so everyone knows up front… Guests know exactly what the meal costs, servers know what they’re making per hour, the host, etc… But Restaurant owners would never pay waitstaff what they average in tips… It would be harder to keep good servers and no one (casual diners) would pay the crazy prices for a meal required to offset the dramatic increase in labor costs… 10 servers @ 2.13=21.30/hour versus 10 servers at say $10= $100/hour…. see where this is going? There is one restaurant around here where it works like that; the Colt & Allison, a 5-star, 5-diamond, members only steakhouse… a waiter there is paid $17/hour and the guests get their dollar’s worth.
I am in total aggreement with you. I am SICK of feeling indebted to someone handing me a cup of coffee, simply because they didn’t spit in it. Service has gotten so poor, yet we are hard pressed to find a counter without a tip jar sitting on it. Even at Starbuck’s, where I put the milk and sugar in my coffee myself, I feel guilty for walking away without giving a tip. $4 for a cup of coffee and a tip too? That’s nerve!I can’t go on, I’m too pissed off. Basically, what you said. Yeah!
Oh, honey … don’t get me started on tip jars! Last week, I was in a fast food restaurant where employees had set up a tip jar. I was stunned.
Bagging my food and handing me my coke over the counter should be regarded as a matter of basic service. What’s next? Tip jars at gas pumps?
My fiance is from Australia, and I’ve been out there twice for three months at a go. There’s no tipping in Oz, unless you are at a fancy restaurant, and then it’s still not 15-20%. Granted, it takes some getting used to, but it works out great in the end. You don’t tip, and they don’t pretend to like you… and they actually get paid a fair wage. go figure…
Oddly enough I still tip at the pubs when the service is good and I’ve had a few pints, and the reaction is mixed. They most likely think it’s funny that yanks feel such obligation… especially Minnesotans who feel guilty about everything in general. Sorry about that last bit.
Was wondering what Mark did for a living and how much he makes. If you are not going to tip a person for extra work after the purchase then do not accept help from them. Usually I find the well off people will not tip if you go out of your way for them, while the average person, no better of than you, will tip. If a person does you a favor, are you going to let them know that you will do them one later?
I too am so sick of tip jars everywhere. I bought a $1.50 cone from Dairy Queen Sunday and the tip jar was right there in front of me with several paper dollars in it – yea right – you know the employees put those in themselves. Also I disagree with Jeff’s comments about not accepting extra service if you are not going to tip. I think it goes without saying that if you purchase a large bag of dog food and other items at Pet Smart that it is a service provided by the store to help you put the items in the car. The only place I haven’t seem tip jars is the grocery stores and who knows when that will start. I am “tipped out”.