What Really Matters?

Want to know the key to creating radical change in your life?

1) Figure out what matters.

2) Act accordingly.

Deceptively simple, eh? But don’t be fooled. Taking this formula to heart can have a profound impact on your life.

Want a real world example? Here’s a quick look at how these two steps are changing who I am and where I’m going.

STEP ONE: Figure out what matters. This sounds easy … but it took some doing. In the end, I came up six things that really matter to me:

1) Honoring my partner. Clyde means the world to me.

2) Honoring myself. That means making better choices, both physically and spiritually.

3) Honoring my commitments. I want to be a man of my word.

4) Honoring what I’ve been given. I’m grateful for my home, my tools, and the blessings I receive every day.

5) Honoring my work. I want to give 100% to making my books and workshops happen.

6) Honoring my family and extended family. I want to strengthen my ties with family and friends. I also want to expand my circle, inviting in new friends and contacts.

Keeping the list short makes it easier to remember and work with. And that’s important, because the next step is…

STEP TWO: Act Accordingly. Here’s where the rubber meets the road. It’s the proof of the pudding. It’s where you discover whether you’re a walker … or just a talker.

1) Honoring Clyde. It’s easy to say “I put my partner first.” It’s harder to live it. I want to devote more time, every day, to thinking about Clyde’s needs … and finding ways to meet them. This week, that’s meant revisiting some projects (like getting a washer/dryer installed upstairs) that I’ve let slip by the wayside because they were difficult or frustrating.

2) Honoring me. Oddly, I have a harder time honoring myself — it’s all too easy to convince myself that professional (paying) priorities should take precedence over personal tasks (like meditating every day). My eating habits have been terrible these last few months; so for me, honoring myself also means making better choices at mealtime. Last night’s vegetarian pasta tasted divine … mostly because I knew it was a meal that was in line with my larger goals.

3) Honoring commitments. When the pressure’s on, it’s easy to let commitments slip: canceling radio appearances, dropping projects, or shuffling my schedule instead of pouring a little extra effort into meeting a deadline. That’s over. I’m going to do what I said I would do. When I can’t, for some reason, meet a deadline, I’ll communicate the problem (and the solution) more clearly.

4) Honoring what I’ve been given means treating my blessings with respect. Our modest house isn’t fancy, but it’s comfortable and manageable. My zone-based cleaning program — cleaning a different room of the house each day — is one way of showing that I honor that blessing. When deadlines are looming, it’s tempting to say, “I’ll just vacuum the bedroom tomorrow.” Sticking to my cleaning schedule is one small way of letting the Universe know I appreciate what I’ve been given.

5) Honoring my work. These last few days have been a joy … because I’m making great strides toward my professional goals. Scripts flew out the door. The novel I’m working on unsnarled and organized itself. Text is being created at a record pace. What’s behind this renaissance? Nothing fancy — just focus. I’ve decided to pour my energy into work that matters to me, so that my dreams can become realities. With every completed project, that published novel and those workshops — the keys to giving my family the things I want us to have — become less imaginary and more real.

6) Honoring my family and extended family. I don’t want to be the guy who lets his daily routine distract him from important contact with family and friends. Instead, I want to be the guy who makes family and friends a priority. That means doing a better job of keeping in touch, answering email in a timely way, making those birthday calls more often, and making sure my actions reflect the intensity of my feelings. Otherwise, how will folks know I’m thinking of them?

Take some time today to consider what’s really important to you.

With that done, ask yourself: “What can I do to bring every action into alignment with what really matters?”