Health and Diet: How I Eat and Why

Four days ago, someone I’d consider a stranger stopped me in the elevator and asked, “What are you doing to lose that weight?” 

That was an important milestone for me, because it means the changes I’ve made in my lifestyle are having effects others can see. As more people notice the differences, the questions begin: What plan? Low carb? Low fat? The Zone? Cleanses? Purges? Pills? 

No one really likes the truth: I’m losing weight … because I’ve stopped trying. My focus is on healthy eating, and on making subtle changes to my routine that support and encourage healthier habits in general. Honestly, the weight loss isn’t a goal — it’s just a side-effect.

Not very sexy or marketable, is it? 

Fat, Thin, and Fat Again

In 2011, unhappy with my weight, I combined a low-carb eating regimen with Tim Ferris’ idea of a blow-it out, epic indulgence day (a once-per-week, hedonistic, non-stop free-for-all day of unabashed gluttony). 

Over eight months, I lost forty pounds. When I hit my goal weight of 195, I resolved not to become that guy who “lost all that weight and gained it all back.” 

In 2012, I gained back thirty of those forty pounds. 

Bad Habits Produce Bad Results

How? Well, first, what had been an indulgence day (Saturday) began expanding into an indulgence weekend, with indulgences starting Friday at breakfast and continuing through Sunday evening. Then, during the week, I added an indulgence on Wednesday night.

And soon, old habits — emotional eating, mindless eating — returned. Fried appetizers? I deserved them. A basket of rolls? So soft, so good — don’t they have to be wholesome? Reese Cups as a mid-afternoon snack at work? What damage can two little peanut butter cups do?

Worse, even though the indulgences were now non-stop, I still considered Saturday (and the weekends, by extension) to be Indulgence Days — and, on those days, ate even more.

Eight months on a low-carb regimen gave me a taste for fatty red meat and heavy dairy. Those habits, combined with my new omnivorous eating plan, created a perfect storm of weight gain and unhealthiness. Soon, I felt sluggish and ill-tempered again — and who wouldn’t, eating that way?

Visit from a Messenger

And then, about six weeks ago, I had a dream. In it, a handsome young man enveloped in golden light looked directly at me and, with a great deal of compassion, asked, “Why are you eating like someone who wants to die?”

Those words hit me like a spike through the heart. I woke up terrified. More importantly, I realized that, instead of just focusing on my weight, I wanted to eat like someone who wants to live: to build dietary habits that contribute to longevity and lucidity and clarity.

So I put my life-long focus on weight loss aside and came up with a new plan. 

The Plan

There’s no name for it. I don’t plan to market it. And it may not even be right for you. But here’s the plan I came up with: with my goals in mind:

1) Eat mostly plants. I want the heart-healthy and anti-cancer advantages of a diet that’s largely plant-based. So now, when I sit down to eat, I eat green vegetables first: spinach, collard greens, peppers, broccoli, celery, spring mix, green beans, peas, asparagus. I supplement those with beans, legumes, colorful peppers, carrots, and a little corn. During the day, I have all the fruit I want: oranges, bananas, apples, grapes, fresh pineapple.  

2) Restrict animal protein. I’m not vegan, but I am interested in the heart-healthy and anti-cancer properties of a vegan or near-vegan diet. When I can’t or don’t want to avoid meat entirely, I’ll generally choose salmon, then seafood in general, then lean white meat, or, if there are no other options, lean red meat. During the week, I try not to eat meat more than once or twice.

I’ve stopped drinking cream in my coffee (and now actually prefer the way it tastes with a cinnamon stick dunked in it). I avoid cheese, yogurt, and other dairy products as much as possible, but don’t freak out if I have to eat a little. I avoid eggs, but I’m aware that some foods I eat have an egg component in them (and I restrict these).

3) Limit carbs. I avoid white bread, white rice, and white sugar (including high fructose corn syrup and all artificial sweeteners), choosing whole grains instead. If I get a bagel, I eat half (with lots of tomato slices, vegetarian sausage, and sprouts). If I get a black bean burger, I eat half the bun. During the week, I don’t generally eat sweets, preferring fruit instead.

4) Eliminate fried foods. Delicious as they are, they’re terrible for you. If I have no other options, I’ll have four or five french fries (instead of a plateful) or one samosa (instead of six) no more than once a week. 

5) On Saturday only, treat yourself to anything — in moderation. A pancake? Sure. A slice of pizza, with real cheese and veggie toppings? Yep. Split a piece of cake with Clyde? Of course. A very fine piece of candy or two? Why not? A small scoop of ice cream? Chocolate, please. A bite or three of mac and cheese? Anything in moderation — that is, keep indulgence portion sizes small.

Honestly, though? As I’m eating better, I want less of stuff like this. Limiting treats gets easier once your body chemistry changes … and, surprisingly, foods like green beans and spinach and quinoa and kale start becoming tastier.

And finally: 

6) Don’t freak out. The goal isn’t to adhere to some crazy-strict regimen; it’s to be a conscious eater, to appreciate what’s in front of me, and to make the best possible choices in the moment.

If I find myself having to eat more whole grain bread at lunch than I would have liked, I have just veggies at dinner. If friends pick a barbecue joint for dinner, I have all the vegetable sides I can eat while still limiting meat and dairy. If a sweet little old lady offers me a plate of cookies, I’ll take one and have a bite rather than offend her. If my FreshNFit vegetarian meal occasionally contains trace amounts of egg or a little cheese, I don’t fret.

The Impact

I feel great. My body tells me I’m getting healthier. And because I’m building habits instead of depending solely on willpower, I’m seeing real success. 

Oh — and, as a side effect, I’m down from 223 to 211 — and falling — without any effort or struggle at all. There is no goal weight this time. Instead, the goal is to eat like someone who plans to be around for a long, sweet life together with the man I love. (There’s a halo effect at work here, too. Now that I’m eating better, he is, too … and we’re both healthier, happier, and losing weight.)

So: I’m happy and healthy and think I’m onto something. Here’s hoping you can find a way of relating to food that works as well for you.