"I mean, you know, I'm thirty-five. Thirty-five. If I've not found anyone by now, I'm not going to find anyone. I mean, at least not for dating. I won't be, like, dating anybody, or expecting romance or flowers or candy or Valentines … that kind of thing. Thirty-five's that age when you start having to hire people to … well, you know … because the younger guys aren't into you and the older guys are just creepy.
"I mean, why do they even make older gays? It's just tragic. It should be like Logan's Run, where death is mandatory at twenty or something, because at least then we'd all die pretty.
"I keep telling people this, and they get all up in arms over it, but I think that's mostly because they know it's true. I mean, look at me. I've got some gray, and my skin's not what it used to be, and every single bite I eat goes you know where, and I'm too worn out to spend hours working it off.
"So, I'm over it. I'm thirty-five, and I'm going to be alone forever, and I'm okay with that. I've got money, and when the pressure builds up and I've got to hook up, well, that's why God made MasterCard."
— One of two diners at the table opposite ours
January 29th
The Colonnade Restaurant
Atlanta, GA
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