On our last, rainy day in Amsterdam, we duck into a local cinema for an English-language screening of Jodie Foster’s Flightplan.
At the concession stand, we pass on the Heineken beer (!), but go for the amazingly fluffy popcorn. When I place my order, the beaming young man behind the counter surprises me by asking, “Sweet or salty?”
With a box of popcorn bigger than my head, we ride the elevator up to City Theatre Seven, take a stadium-style seat, and tuck in for the show. As it turns out, the half-hour of advertisements prior to the movie are more entertaining than anything in the film itself.
Instead of the tired American “Wanta Fanta” campaign, the ad for Fanta Citrus depicts a young man on a dating show winning the rights to snuggle sensually against not one but two sexily-clad black women. As the women rub their soft cheeks against his scruffy jawline, the boy moans with pleasure. Suddenly, though the women are replaced by bottles of Fanta, and we see that the young man is really just standing outside a convenience store’s beverage cooler, rubbing the chilly bottles against his face. (The counter man calls him a freak and chases him away.)
Not racy enough for you? The next ad features two lanky gay men in bed together, discussing the merits and disadvantages of their online banking service. Can you imagine the uproar that would result if Earthlink ran similar ads before PG-rated movies in the U.S.?
The ad that shocks even me, though, is one of the last ones shown before the featured presentation. On screen, we see a young man — fifteen or sixteen years old — sitting in a dark bedroom, lit only by the glare from his laptop. We can’t see the site he’s browsing — we’re behind the computer, facing him — but we can see his intense, hungry expression and hear the twangy, 1970’s-era porn music issuing from his computer speakers.
He draws closer and closer to the screen, mesmerized by what he sees. Suddenly, he tilts back in his chair, lifts his shirt, exposes his belly, and shoves his hand into his jeans. Just as he starts to masturbate, the camera cuts away …
… to reveal he’s been looking at an ad for Vodophone cellular service. (“Tell everyone,” the voice-over urges.)
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