The Callie Conundrum

The Callie Conundrum

Right up front: Callie’s not a bad dog.

Callie’s owners, though, leave something to be desired. As soon as they moved into the house behind us, they began leaving Callie unattended for hours at a time. Callie compensated by barking continuously — often for six or seven hours at a stretch — until they came home.

This wouldn’t be much of an issue if Callie were a tiny, yip-yappy dog. Unfortnately, Callie is a massive, fully-grown German shepherd the size of a small pony … with the lungs to match. Each bark has roughly the same decibel level as a car door being slammed. By the sixth hour of constant barking, we’ve usually had more than enough.

Just before Christmas, Callie gave up on barking and switched to a newer, more effective anti-boredom strategy: tunneling. Now, about once a week, Callie digs a tunnel under the fence that seperates her yard from ours. She winds up in our back yard, rooting around in Chelsea’s play areas and pacing in front of our patio windows, looking for a playmate.

This delights Chelsea, our tiny Daschund/Terrier mix (perhaps they both speak German?). Chelsea has no qualms about playing with a dog six or seven times her size, and the two always have a great time frolicking in the back yard together.

This, too, would be bearable on occasion … except that now, Callie has learned how to squeeze herself through Chelsea’s tiny doggie door. The other morning, I stepped out of the shower, opened the bathroom door, and found myself knocked to the floor by an over-enthusiastic German shepherd.

This took me completely by surprise, and I screamed like a little girl … which must have spooked Callie, because she tucked tail and ran. (I would too, if I happened on a pale, hairy, naked forty-year-old man wallowing on my bathroom floor and screaming.)

As of today, Callie’s owners — who are slooooow to return calls, and not very much concerned with Callie’s hijinks in general — have promised twice to “do something” about the situation. That’s not much consolation on days like today, when Callie has actually ripped the lower portion of the fence boards away and once again become an intruder into our home.

These unexpected visits drive the cats crazy. Plus, Callie’s a big girl. She tends to knock over objects … and even the people … in her path. Worse, she’s becoming a bit aggressive toward us when we usher her back outside: it’s clear she doesn’t want to go home, and she communicates this by offering — ever so slightly — to bite the hand that pushes her toward the door.

We’ve covered the tunnels as best we can; she digs more. We’ve put up with the occasional visit … but now, we’re dealing with outright intrusions. Her owners seem disinclined to do anything, despite three very polite calls describing the situation and asking for their help.

What to do? I’m open to suggestions.

Right up front: Callie’s not a bad dog.

Callie’s owners, though, leave something to be desired. As soon as they moved into the house behind us, they began leaving Callie unattended for hours at a time. Callie compensated by barking continuously — often for six or seven hours at a stretch — until they came home.

This wouldn’t be much of an issue if Callie were a tiny, yip-yappy dog. Unfortnately, Callie is a massive, fully-grown German shepherd the size of a small pony … with the lungs to match. Each bark has roughly the same decibel level as a car door being slammed. By the sixth hour of constant barking, we’ve usually had more than enough.

Just before Christmas, Callie gave up on barking and switched to a newer, more effective anti-boredom strategy: tunneling. Now, about once a week, Callie digs a tunnel under the fence that seperates her yard from ours. She winds up in our back yard, rooting around in Chelsea’s play areas and pacing in front of our patio windows, looking for a playmate.

This delights Chelsea, our tiny Daschund/Terrier mix (perhaps they both speak German?). Chelsea has no qualms about playing with a dog six or seven times her size, and the two always have a great time frolicking in the back yard together.

This, too, would be bearable on occasion … except that now, Callie has learned how to squeeze herself through Chelsea’s tiny doggie door. The other morning, I stepped out of the shower, opened the bathroom door, and found myself knocked to the floor by an over-enthusiastic German shepherd.

This took me completely by surprise, and I screamed like a little girl … which must have spooked Callie, because she tucked tail and ran. (I would too, if I happened on a pale, hairy, naked forty-year-old man wallowing on my bathroom floor and screaming.)

As of today, Callie’s owners — who are slooooow to return calls, and not very much concerned with Callie’s hijinks in general — have promised twice to “do something” about the situation. That’s not much consolation on days like today, when Callie has actually ripped the lower portion of the fence boards away and once again become an intruder into our home.

These unexpected visits drive the cats crazy. Plus, Callie’s a big girl. She tends to knock over objects … and even the people … in her path. Worse, she’s becoming a bit aggressive toward us when we usher her back outside: it’s clear she doesn’t want to go home, and she communicates this by offering — ever so slightly — to bite the hand that pushes her toward the door.

We’ve covered the tunnels as best we can; she digs more. We’ve put up with the occasional visit … but now, we’re dealing with outright intrusions. Her owners seem disinclined to do anything, despite three very polite calls describing the situation and asking for their help.

What to do? I’m open to suggestions.

Mark McElroy

I'm a husband, mystic, writer, media producer, creative director, tinkerer, blogger, reader, gadget lover, and pizza fiend.

3 comments

  • Mark, you know I’m a dog lover. I’m a BIG dog lover (size of dogs, that is LOL!). And I feel sorry for Callie, and if it was Callie’s family that had asked for help, I’d have lots of Callie-oriented suggestions.

    But it wasn’t, it was you…and you have to consider your safety & privacy & property!

    1st, I’d research local leash laws. I’d bet you quite a bit that they’re breaking them, by allowing her off their property, out of their control…as soon as she hits your side of the tunnel, they’re broken.

    If they’re breaking the law, you can 1)Call animal control, 2)Call the police, 3)Both. No one wants to piss off the neighbors, or send an animal to the pound. But you have given these folks time and patience; they’ve done nothing to fix the problem. Perhaps a little authority brought to bear would make them realize that this is serious!

    Also, keep track of property damage…they should be liable. Pictures, pictures, pictures. Video of the pup (dirty paws & all) in your house, dirtying your carpet, breaking your fence, digging up your garden.

    There are nuisancy neighbors, and then there are outrages. This is outrageous, Mark!!

    Or you could go over and sneeze on them, repeatedly!!

    Janet

  • Mark, you know I’m a dog lover. I’m a BIG dog lover (size of dogs, that is LOL!). And I feel sorry for Callie, and if it was Callie’s family that had asked for help, I’d have lots of Callie-oriented suggestions.

    But it wasn’t, it was you…and you have to consider your safety & privacy & property!

    1st, I’d research local leash laws. I’d bet you quite a bit that they’re breaking them, by allowing her off their property, out of their control…as soon as she hits your side of the tunnel, they’re broken.

    If they’re breaking the law, you can 1)Call animal control, 2)Call the police, 3)Both. No one wants to piss off the neighbors, or send an animal to the pound. But you have given these folks time and patience; they’ve done nothing to fix the problem. Perhaps a little authority brought to bear would make them realize that this is serious!

    Also, keep track of property damage…they should be liable. Pictures, pictures, pictures. Video of the pup (dirty paws & all) in your house, dirtying your carpet, breaking your fence, digging up your garden.

    There are nuisancy neighbors, and then there are outrages. This is outrageous, Mark!!

    Or you could go over and sneeze on them, repeatedly!!

    Janet

  • Poor Callie, poor you.

    Unfortunately, all of the solutions rest with Callie’s owners. She needs exercise and attention, but you know that. Poor girl might be able to substitute attention with toys– big tug ropes smeared with peanut butter the first time to attract her interest– Kong toys filled with treats and stuff– intellibox toys and things to keep her busy. I’d recommend SitStay.com’s toy index, (I don’t work for them, any place would have some of these things). But they would have to care to provide her with things.

    If she has basic obedience then that can help with the aggression. You go out the door first, and call. Treat her for leaving. Have her sit, wait, and you return to the house. If she’s out 24/7 someone at the MS eqivalent of the SPCA could perhaps “provide input”. Of course you are neighbors so reporting could be a problem.

    Wish I lived there. I’d donate a laundry basket of toys she could destroy…

  • Hi,

    There are dog doors that only open if the dog has a collar that emits an electronic signal. It might not work in your case, since your dog would have to wear one of the signal emitting collars. When Callie walks up to the dog door your dog would probably walk up to it, too, and then her collar would send out the signal and Callie would get in. On the other hand, maybe you could set up a door that wouldn’t open if a certain signal was emitted and then just get Callie to wear a collar emitting that signal. Or you could get Callie stuffed. Apparently her owners wouldn’t notice much of a difference.

    Ruth

Who Wrote This?

Mark McElroy

I'm a husband, mystic, writer, media producer, creative director, tinkerer, blogger, reader, gadget lover, and pizza fiend.

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